So, in my journey of recovery, after meeting up with some of my amazing and supportive friends at Barnes and Noble to talk about all things faith, I realized one of the things that is reinforcing the roadblock I've hit:
negativivity
Negativity about my situation, negativity in my words, negativity in my actions-- the ugly thing made a mess everywhere, feeding my disorder, limiting my faith.
How can I be a child of the light, a daughter of the great Father in Heaven, a conqueror because of Him, when my words are ridden with lack of joy and doubt?
Here is a poem I wrote as a reminder to myself, and anyone else who, like me, might be facing a challenging crossroads in their own journey: speak positive into this world, or speak negative into this world.
Speak positive into existence;
Let only beautiful and luminescence;
Be your sentences and phrases;
Let your every word be praises.
Take a spin on what you see;
Create with every thought a better memory
Than useless words would permit,
Or negative statements would commit.
Rather than fear, laugh in confidence!
Rather than disclaimers, let hope commence!
For how could I ever attempt to inspire,
if joy and good thoughts weren't the heart of my fire?
Be watchful, negative is so sneaky,
And the vessel it sits in is often leaky,
Dripping with darkness, oozing with lies,
So guard your heart, and open your eyes.
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